Thursday, August 11, 2005

stay cool with bex, ya'll

I like the girl on the right. She's perfected the stunned Kate-Moss-on-coke look:


I had a fabulous last tour. I met one real whackjob and the rest were absolutely delightful. It's not only nice to hear Thank You's, but it's nice to know that these are people you'll definitely keep in touch with and will probably see again.

Crazy Farhana, Irish girl, Holly, and Bridget (Bridget is totally crypt-keeping it):

We spent most of our time on the felucca talking about Nicole Kidman and just how much we hate her. We would often ask ourselves, "What would Nicole do?" And being the crypt-keeper she is, the answer was usually something pretaining to a receding hairline, nub-y teeth, or not using shine-reducing face powder. Bridget's crypt-keeper inspiration:


Me, Jessie, and Bridget not using bio-degradeable soap in the Nile. Maybe it'll fend off that nasty bilharzia everyone's always talking about (note: Bridget's hair):

One of the things that we do while on feluccas is run around campfires like drunk idiots. On the right hand side you'll notice a woman with a tasteful blue sarong. Her name is Little Becky. She's a fiesty 40-something that dances like she's from Arkansas. She was on holiday with her equally disturbing son. It was a colorful cast of characters that evening.

Holly's working her hat. I'm working the veins on my arms:


I managed to get two people on my tour laid - nobody ever said I don't run a full-service operation...

One night, a girl on my tour knocked on my door offering me a bag of chips and asking for antibiotics for diarrhea. Not one of the most attractive encounters I've had at 4am. Even in my drunken stupor, I could see that this was a blatant (yet so, so poor) attempt at getting my room. I know it's shocking, but I didn't let her in.

But I did wake up to a note under my door. Here it is:

"Eric. I really wanted 2 spend an hour or two in your company 2night but you blew me out! I am so upset! (Jooke!)"

It's difficult to come up with a response to this.